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Maybe it’s time to create some room in your life for doing things which please you?

We’ve only got one life and how we spend the time is important because if we ‘recharge our batteries’ then we’re going to be able to give to others. It’s important to do things which are realistic and enjoyable and not put pressure on ourselves. One thing I noticed about expectations around Christmas is that there’s a lot of pressure in the media to produce the ‘perfect Christmas’. This simply isn’t possible because we can’t control everything in the world around us. Somebody in my family once used the phrase ‘perfect imperfection’ when I was expressing annoyance with my efforts. Wise words – because doing things which please us and please others may not be perfect, but they’ll be meaningful which will hopefully bring joy and satisfaction.

Image of colourful umbrellas that have been thrown in the air.

Doing things which please ‘ourselves’, as in ‘myself’, may seem selfish, whereas in fact it is essential for us to do things which please ourselves to be able to function in life. These might involve activities we have not done for a while, for example, I used to make jewellery and I’m wondering why I never bother anymore (after all, I’ve got lots of materials at home I could use!). It may be that we don’t need that activity in our life any longer, so we just move on, however it might be because we’re not giving ourselves precious ‘recharge’ time. Can you think of any activities you used to do that you really liked but no longer find the time for, or perhaps something new you would like to do?

Image of gold baubles.

A colleague I worked with once said ‘the little things make a difference Rachel’. And when I thought about this, I realised how true it was. A gentle smile to a stranger or loved one, a cup of tea at an opportune moment, touching someone on the shoulder, giving people a hug, sending a message, or picking up a phone. All these things are important, and arguably are the things which make us human. There’s a lot of stuff going on in the world which is hard to take in terms of people experiencing very difficult circumstances, conflict, bad news, rising prices etc.  One way to help overcome this is to give ourselves something good.

Try giving yourself something good today; you could make yourself a special drink e.g., type of tea or coffee that you haven’t made in a while or a special hot chocolate, how about a meal for you and someone you love? Perhaps a walk when the sun is shining, listening to a meaningful piece of music, watching a comedy programme and so on. These are just a few of the many suggestions which do not cost a lot but make your life and hence other people’s lives, better.

Rachel Honeyford

I work by providing a safe, confidential space where people can bring their feelings and thoughts and work at their own pace. My aim is to be supportive and compassionate while helping people see aspects of their situation they haven't already considered. I aim to adapt my approach to every unique individual's particular wishes, needs and circumstances. For example, I offer the opportunity to work creatively and/or look at past experiences or how someone thinks and feels in 'the here and now'.

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